Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
