I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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