hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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