She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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