Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
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