why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
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I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
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Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.