i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
