I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize