That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize