The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
