talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
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If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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