Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
