its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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