God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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