I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize