Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
