I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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