the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
