half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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