Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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