Porn is love you can see.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
