At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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