ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
