I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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