? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
