Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
