Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
