her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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