Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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