every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
