I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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