well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
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