I CAN MOONWALK!
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
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