Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize
