Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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