I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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