We won't sleep together?
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I think my fart just growled at me.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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