how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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