some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
