someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize