Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize