I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize