You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Come share oat with me in your robe
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Randomize
