1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
