Someone shit on the floor
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
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I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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