Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
home. puking in laundry basket.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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