hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
