CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
