the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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