it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
